November 30, 2025

Happy St. Andrew's Day!

Happy St. Andrew’s Day!

As Thanksgiving Weekend draws to a close and the holidays kick fully into gear, I thought I’d share some accumulated wisdom for those heading out to the Dickens Fair this year.

A long time regular attendee, since My Favorite Person and I went for the first time in 2014, over my ten annuals of attendance (every year but 2020) I’ve frequently had the pleasure of introducing folks for the first time. A good friend (Hello Elana!) is going today for the first time and texted me yesterday for any “advice” I might have and while my first reaction was “not really, it’s a Christmas Fair with better hats” my second was, “I guess, actually, I do have some advice.”

So… here it is.

TWELVE TIPS FOR THE GREAT DICKENS CHRISTMAS FAIR AND VICTORIAN HOLIDAY PARTY

By

A Victor Hugo Fan*

1. If you’re going alone this won’t apply to you, nor will it apply if you all arrive together, but if you’re meeting up with folks (like I usually do) take my advice: JUST GET INTO THE COW PALACE FIRST. Don’t try to meet up in the parking lot, don’t wait for folks to arrive, etc. Just be responsible for getting yourself and whoever is with you through the line, which is long and two by two, so depending on when you arrive (I tend towards early morning, when it moves pretty fast) you can actually feel time ticking by standing there, as opposed to once inside The Fair, where time seems to no longer have meaning. Get yourself into the fair, and meet up there, and you’ll have already reduced the stress of the day by half, easy.

2. START AN INSTANT MESSAGE PHONE TREE with everyone you’re hanging out with at The Fair, because even if you all arrive together, you will at some point almost certainly get separated from one another. Also, there is a certain pleasure to wandering The Fair alone, and everyone should do it for a little bit. The phone tree makes it easy to find out where folks are, so you can meet back up with them when it’s time to buy the next round of drinks, go to tea, play a game or see a show together.

3. Speaking of wandering The Fair, DO A FULL WALK THROUGH OF THE WHOLE FAIR BEFORE YOU SPEND ANY MONEY. This may actually be the best advice I have to give, because the first year I went I did the thing where I immediately spent all the money I had in about thirty minutes and then spent the next hour wandering around feeling like there was nothing to do. The fact is, though you don’t need to have a lot of money to enjoy The Fair, having no money will limit what you can do, eat, drink, etc. so you want to just spend the money you do have in a way that will ultimately feel satisfying, even when it runs out. The challenge is, EVERYTHING at The Fair smells good, tastes good, and looks cool, so it’s very easy to just blow through your wallet. Hence, show some restraint, do a full walk through, BROWSE the shops, and THEN get a drink and/or something to eat and see what calls to you enough to actually go back and buy it.

4. BUDGET BEFORE YOU GO. Decide how much money you’re willing to spend at The Fair, and then hold to that limit. Personally, I allot myself $240, and save up each year, putting a literal $20 bill aside every month in a box that I then empty the morning of The Fair. I then put $40 of that in my shoe so I know I have enough money to get home with, and spend the other $200 (yes, I only use cash at The Fair). Or less. The last two years I’ve come home under budget and it turns out it’s great. This year, I bought myself breakfast at my favorite brunch spot using using leftover Dickens Dollars. You know what tastes awesome? Not going deeper into debt.

5. BRING CASH TO TIP. Look, alcohol isn’t the best thing about The Fair, but Hot Buttered Rum is one of the best things about being alive so while I’m not encouraging anyone to get shitfaced at The Fair I do encourage you to have at least one drink, if you drink. I will also point out that Britain is a drinking culture and one thing The Fair captures well is the color and vivacity of 19th century Public Houses. There are six or so official “bars” at The Fair, each with its own vibe and menu (“The Bohemian” is best for cocktails), and the Bartenders are hands down not only skilled booze slingers, but usually some of the best character actors. A lot of them are also… kind of hot. Whatever way you swing. And putting up with A LOT from customers. So even if you mostly use card at The Fair, bring cash to tip the food and beverage staff. They deserve it, and they usually reward you back with some choice praise. God loves a tipper.

6. GO HUNGRY BUT EAT LIGHTLY. Somewhere under “Atmosphere” and above “Hot Buttered Rum”, the food really is the best thing about The Fair, whether it’s the roast beef sandwich that My Favorite Person maintains is the best roast beef sandwich in San Francisco, or the infamous Hot Nuts, or the meat pies, or the cookies; all of it is made with love, and true to the time period, about five hundred stone of butter. So, avoid having full meals or you’ll end up feeling too full to keep wandering, plus you’ll have to choose instead of sample, which is a lot more fun. Personally, I avoid The High Tea, which is perfectly decent but not worth the price compared to equally priced, far better (as far as the food and tea selection goes) high teas around town, and it tends to leave you feeling full of starch, short on room for pie. Instead, hit up the different vendors providing period street snacks and get something every time you drink, or every ninety minutes or so. Stay peckish and The Fair is your oyster. And remember, because a lot of it is packaged to be eaten on the go, you can take it home too.

7. WHEN YOU NEED TO REST, SEE A SHOW. Pretty much all of the live theatre, music, acrobatics, and other entertainments at The Fair are free, so if you want to just sit down for a bit and check your brain, shows are a great way to be at The Fair without spending money on a drink or food. All of the bars and restaurants at The Fair are small and seating is limited to customers and while nobody’s ever pushed me or my friends along you should respect that. While there are benches scattered around the streets, those are also best for shoppers to pause for a moment, so if you need to camp out for a bit Mad Sal’s or The Victoria and Albert Royal Hall are the places to be. Show attendance is very casual, with audiences free to come and go mid-act so long as they’re not intrusive, and performers usually pretty used to it if they are. Theatre at The Fair is… um… enthusiastic (unless it’s A CHRISTMAS CAROL, which is usually pretty good, but you have to follow the scenes to different locations over the day) but fun. Acrobatics and magic acts are enjoyable and usually the most family friendly. The music, however, is by far the best executed, with a number of really good choirs, chanty groups, and small chamber orchestras playing at different times. There’s also Fezziwig’s if you’re into dancing or just watching dancers, and the London Docks are a nice place to rest with or without a show as they’re the only dimly lit portion of The Fair and the smaller stages (when not in use) make for great locations to have quiet conversations. If you want something more edifying, The Athenian Club offers lectures, but my experience of them is mixed and it really does depend on the subject and the presenter. No one’s really going to The Fair to like... learn. All that said…

8. …WEAR COMFORTABLE SHOES because you will be walking and standing most of the time.

9. PAY ATTENTION TO THE GHOSTS. With it being indoors and consistently lit throughout the day, it can be hard, even with everyone having phones now, to keep track of the time. The labyrinthine layout of The Fair doesn’t help either, and if anything encourages you to keep wandering in circles until closing. One fun way to stay aware of the time is by keeping an eye out of the three ghosts from Dickens’ A CHRISTMAS CAROL, which is actually being acted out all around you the whole time. If you see The Ghost of Christmas Past (female, dressed in white, glowing crown of white branches) it is still morning. If you see The Ghost of Christmas Present (male, tall, red and white robe, crown of holly) then you are in the noon to 3 PM window. If you see The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come (face masked, tall, black robe, low key terrifying) then you’re in the final few hours of The Fair. Once upon a time there was also the Queen Victoria Parade, which was awesome and usually happened around 3:30-4, and was when My Favorite Person and I would consider The Fair “done”. The parade was discontinued after the pandemic due to um… (cough) performative (cough) reasons… even though it was a nice nod to actual Victorian England, but there is a Santa Claus parade now which, though earlier, is probably a good cue to segue out if you’re there with kids. Either way you choose, by Ghost or Globalism…

10. LEAVE WHEN IT’S TIME. You’ll know it, you’ll feel it, don’t ignore it. Take a deep breath, pick something to either do, buy or see that’s close to the exit, and then go there. And then leave. The Fair is wonderful but it’s exhausting and once the day turns it starts to become overwhelming, grating, and your memories will be tarnished. The best thing about The Fair is that it is but once a year and leaving when it’s time is a great way to ensure you’ll want to come back again when it’s time. So just go, even if that means you “Irish Goodbye.”

11. HIT THE BOOKSTORE ON THE GRAND CONCOURSE LAST OF ALL. So, the Bookstore/Antique shop is maybe the most unassuming shop at the Dickens Fair, while also being one of the best kept secrets. While most of the items for sale at The Fair are unique, beautiful, hand-made and designed to evoke the period, this store is selling the real deal. So if you’re into authentic souvenirs of another time period, this is where you will find them, especially books, prints, lithographs, or cameos. There’s also a selection of fine period china and silver, and other little treasures like music boxes and jewelry cases. That said, pretty much everything in this store is WILDLY EXPENSIVE, with even small and unremarkable books starting at $50 and most things idling around $75 to $120 but going even higher depending on the age and condition of the item. So I usually recommend coming here last, partly because it’s very close to the exit, and especially if you are like me, and this store was designed by God to take all of your money. That said, it’s a great way to budget too. I hold onto $80 to spend at this store every year, and if I don’t find anything, I walk out the door with $80 in my pocket and $40 in my shoe. See above re: breakfast.

12. IT’S “HAPPY CHRISTMAS” not “MERRY CHRISTMAS,” and the easiest way to participate, without having to buy an outfit, or botch an accent.

* This joke is hilarious, for the right people.

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